b1g · football
Sumptuary Edict Issued Regarding Excessive Poultry Consumption Along the Peristyle Thoroughfare
An inquiry into the provisions, charcoal smoke, and horse-trough logistics of the Trojan campus ahead of the weekend pilgrimage.
The pilgrims of the Pacific coast gather once more upon the grassy expanse outside the stadium, bearing provisions of salt-cured swine and fermented barley. It is a wondrous fellowship, though marred by modern carriages that lack proper clearance for our heavy lances. Veray, the smoke rising from the portable iron hearths obscures the sun entirely, testing the patience of the marshals who patrol the outer gates.
Among this assembly, the noble keepers of the Troy horse attend to their beast with great curtesye, offering sweet hay and rubbing its flank against the autumn chill. Yet, rumors of distant outposts in the eastern realms reach our ears—pagan lands where snow falls early and the men wear strange garments of maize and blue. Our knights must prepare their armor for such perilous journeys, though few among us understand the strange maps that depict these far-off provinces.
Let the stewards of the tailgate maintain their trouthe and avoid the sin of glotonye before the contest begins. For truly, a knight heavy with roasted fowl cannot hope to outrun the swift miller's son from across the county. We await the referees' whistle with pious hope, praying that the parchment of our playbook remains untouched by base commercial greed.
Now, gentil heer, look well to your provisions and guard your gates against the wandering pardoner who sells false amulets of victory. Go forth with chivalry, and may your smoke ring be parfit in the eyes of heaven.